Monday 23 February 2015

What if you develop Dementia?

  Hello All
Many thanks for your comments on my last post.
Welcome to Chris Moorwood on the Follower bar and Crafty Mum, Sharon Deasy, Beth and The Pumpkin Life on Blog Lovin.
                                                        Last week I popped in on an dear old friend of ours. We have known S and his sweet wife C. since our eldest were little. They are smallholders too, buying their place the year before we did ours. For many years C. has been the carer for S. who has mobility and sight difficulties. They have mucked along well, with a busy lifestyle and many friends. Unfortunately C. has developed dementia, which has raced along . Reluctantly S. has had to make arrangements for C. to go into a home. (racing after someone who has "escaped" again in the middle of the country when you can only shuffle a few steps is an impossible task) Finding the right place for an active "fit as a butchers dog" 70 year old has been problematical as she won't stay in one place long and is constantly finding things to do..... "helping" other residents in and out of bed, moving the fire extinguisher, packing other residents belongings up etc.. you get the idea. As yet the right place hasn't been found that can meet C's needs. As a retired Social Worker I have a pretty good idea of the difficulties of finding a good "fit" for residential care and individuals and feel for S as he has to deal with his anxiety for C's welfare and the "guilt" he feels because he can't look after her himself.
How many of us make plans for our retirement, often moving to the country or the sea, thinking that we might eventually have to downsize a little or cut down on the number of animals we are going to keep,We then see our future as just doing a little less, as we knit and sew and go for little walks or out to lunch with friends as we slow down? Do we give any thought to be mentally unable? I certainly haven't, I now have food for thought.

Yesterday the family came for tea as usual. EGD had found a site that has a sale of dress patterns. We had already decided that we were going to make dresses for ourselves this year and had drawn a blank at the CSs. We spent a happy hour choosing patterns and are now looking forward to the patterns arriving and us choosing the material. I think we will have to go into Derby for the material, as there are a couple of large material stalls at the Eagle Centre Market. So long a they don't make me go into the HUGE shopping centre which used to be Westfield.(don't know its new name) This centre is a huge soulless mall that has all the "big" names and absolutely no character or individuality. If ever I have to go there (M&S Jeans) I emerge a husk,  The site we used was  "Sew essential" - New Look patterns. The patterns were half price which is a great saving.

Last week, after I got back from visiting S., David and I started to get the veg beds ready. A good start was made, after a shower I started the emails that I am tasked to send on behalf of the Civic Society and I really felt we were getting on well. Huh!
The next morning I could hardly move as my back had "gone", I shuffled around like a cross between Quasimodo and Julie Walter's serving soup. That put paid to any heavy gardening, but here was till much to do in the house. The next morning (Friday) I woke up rolled over and was immediately sick. B****r. the sicky/fally-over thing that put me in hospital a couple of times last year was back. Fortunately I have some anti-sickness pills for it (which don't seem to work) and an understanding of what was happening to me. So I have been sitting down getting increasingly frustrated while I got my balance back.
Today I am more my old self and feeling positive that I am on the mend.

Tonight David and I are going to view some pigs. I am very excited! Will let you know how I get on.
Take Care all
Gillx



21 comments:

  1. We have many new part time jobs in Derbyshire which may be of interest to your readers why not check them out.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh heck - I hope you get well soon.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Feeling better already thanks. The sun is shining this morning too!

      Delete
  3. Oh, I hope your back gets back to 'normal' soon and your balance problem sorts itself out too!
    I've been watching River cottage Australia' and really enjoyed it. The chap there had a big boar called Big Boy and last nights' programme showed them roasting one of the pigs. Hope your new pigs earn their keep!
    Take care xxx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Pigs now in their first "baby" bed and looking good. I think we will bacon one of them.
      feeling much better today thanks

      Delete
  4. How exciting about the pigs, sorry to hear of your health problems hope they sort themselves out soon.
    The dressmaking sounds good, have you gone for a vintage style, they had some lovely ones on the Great British sewing B last week. :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My eldest granddaughter is looking at a vintage look dress and it will really suit her. I love the Great British Sewing Bee too.
      Pigs now here !

      Delete
  5. Oh dear Gill, its sounds like a bad few days, glad to read you are on the mend. Sorry to hear if your friends health problems, Dementia is at the back of my mind at the moment, my Mum is very confused and forgetful just now and after treatment for a water infection and a course of B12 injections I am hoping she continues to improve. According to the Dr the next step is to see a Consultant and maybe a visit to the Memory Clinic. Just need to keep a close eye on her.

    Hope the piggies are just what you are looking for. xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad you have identified an infection, so often missed and a major cause of confusion in folks.Good you can keep a close eye on her. it's so worrying isn't it? My mother was becoming confused in the months before her heart gave out and she kept saying "I'm a silly old fool aren't I?" it was so upsetting for her.
      Let's hope we are spared it.
      Take care

      Delete
  6. If it is any consolation Gill, I had a couple of bouts of that 'sicky dizzy thing' three years ago - both times ending up going into hospital in the middle of thenight by ambulance. They could find no real reason for it. Thank goodness it nowseems to have gone away (I bought a small plastic bin for the side of the bed in case it struck again last time, and since then it has never returned. All to do with the balance in the ear I was told. Hope it soon goes for you too. And hope the back is soon better.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes Weave, it is to do with the inner ear (Vestibula Neuropathy). I was told that it would gradually reduce, so I suppose I was disappointed when it returned as I thought I was through with it! It tends to leave me really tired, but I seem to have got over this bout quickly, so that's good.
      Thanks

      Delete
  7. My late mother-in-law had dementia. It was horrifying to watch a previously successful businesswoman suffer that end to her life. And extremely difficult for all left to care for her. I wouldn't wish it on anyone - ever.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. As I get older it is becoming something I fear for myself and my husband and of course our daughters and their families. I look at my hunk of a husband and know I could not handle him if he became as "difficult" as some I have seen. When you live the life you and I live it certainly isn't manageable if one of you were thus incapacitated.

      Delete
  8. I read your post today with interest and sadness. Firstly, I'd like to pass on my best wishes for your speedy recovery - it's so frustrating to fall ill when you have so much to get done!
    Secondly, dementia is a terrible, cruel illness. My mother suffered a stroke in August and has been going downhill ever since. She has now become one of the 'difficult' ones. She's in a home for now, but is always looking for ways to 'escape' (could be tricky as she is in a full leg plaster having broken her leg in January!!). I dread the phone calls as she is always so abusive. I fear I have lost my mum forever now ..... Makes me want to push forward with the next stage of my life before it's too late!!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Hello, nice to see you here and thanks for your good wishes.
    My friend S.has started to dread phone calls as C. has now been "expelled" from two homes because of her behaviour!. Despite this C. is very happy and in truth doesn't know if S.goes daily or monthly as she has no concept of time or of who he is.. If your mum has reached this stage, be good to yourself and do what you need to do.
    Take Care and look after yourself

    ReplyDelete
  10. Hope they find the right fit, how sad!
    Hope you stay well, and are able to do your sewing, and garden work!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Much better now thank you. had a huge bonfire yesterday after some gardens clearing - very theraputic!
      I believe they have another place lined up. I do hope it is the right one this time.

      Delete
  11. So sorry to hear you are poorly, hope you recover soon. My mother had Alzheimers so it is very much on my mind. That's why I enjoy my life as much as I can now. You never know what is around the corner

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm okay now thanks.
      I really do think that Alzheimers is the worst end of life experience for a person and their family. I find myself looking for signs in myself an my husband.

      Delete
  12. I have the sicky balance thing a few times. Last time I was int he office, was sent home in a car, was sick out of the window, fell over outside the front door of my home, was sick again and then crawled inside. The taxi driver offered to take me to hospital but I declined. In my case it was vertigo brought on by an infection of the inner ear, which is made worse if you are dehydrated. Make sure you drink some water before going to bed, especially if you have had a glass of wine...

    ReplyDelete
  13. Pigs! How exciting! Hopefully you are most definitely on the mend. I've had bouts with both back pain and dizziness and know these are absolutely no fun. Do take care of yourself!

    ReplyDelete